Here it is – My birth story.

As I was approaching my due date the (10^th March) I was if I’m honest getting a little impatient even though I kept telling myself my baby will come when my baby is ready (thanks to the hypnobirthing training) and I was adamant I would have her early especially as my first was a week early. We had the birthing pool at home all ready to go but on Saturday 6^th of March we were having problems with the little one and I also had an infection.

The closer to the end of my pregnancy I was getting the more anxious I was becoming. The staff were lovely and advised me the best option was to be induced. This was the last thing I wanted, going from wanting a natural home birth, but I used my skills and all I’d learned from the hypnobirthing and to decide which was best for me to do and using my brain and the fact it was medical, my husband and I decided it was the right choice.

We started the induction on Sunday the 7^th March they couldn’t break my waters, so I had the balloon inserted sadly this still didn’t work so well I then had the pessary and my waters then broke on their own on the 8^th.

My labour started to pick up but sadly not enough to avoid the hormone drip (which I really didn’t want) My hypnobirthing skills had really kept me calm and relaxed but now being the 9^th of March and the intensity of the drip was too much I was losing focus and control. I had an epidural at this point but just enough to help me, I was able to still feel my contractions and even feel her be born. This was truly amazing.

Even though it wasn’t at all my birth plan it was still the most positive and amazing experience of my life. I feel extremely lucky to have the support of the hospital staff and my husband they were all truly amazing and I feel very proud of myself too.

We had a good hour – hour and a half to enjoying skin on skin and her first feed before we told the rest of the family.

Thank you Danielle for all your blogs your daughter Millie is beautful and it was great to finally meet you all!

Jess

view more blogs here

Guest blog: Into the third trimester 30 weeks

Well and truly into the third trimester. I really feel like the end is in sight now and couldn’t be more excited, though I’ve still a little way to go so need to try and remain calm (so hard)

Christmas was very interesting for so many of us we had a very quiet and chilled one. I did have to visit the hospital for reduced movement, but all was fine, it’s funny how soon as you arrive, they start moving non-stop. Baby is moving and taking my breath away at times now, but it’s the best feeling I’m going to miss it so much, so I’m really trying to make the most of every second.

I’ve started to get a bit more organised as I felt like I had all the big items cot, pram and car seat but I have none of the essential bits you need, like swaddles and baby-grows vest, muslins even wipes and cotton wool. Luckily my mum is getting my nappies. I’ve made a list of what I need for me post-birth.

Me and my husband have decided on a home birth. We hope to hire a birthing pool, and I’ve been doing the positive birthing company digital pack, which is honestly amazing; it teaches you so much. There was so much I didn’t even know about, and I’ve given birth once already ha-ha. There are so many tools you can use to make the birth of your baby comfortable and positive if that’s at home, in a birthing centre or the delivery suite. I’m really excited to use all of what I’ve learnt wherever that might be.

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Thank you, Danielle, we are both sad I cannot photograph her beautiful bump and family, as we are still in lockdown and photography is non-essential.

I can’t wait to photograph Danielle and her new baby and family when I’m allowed to re-open.

My free PDF with tips and guidance on how to photograph your newborn at home has been very popular, click here to read all about it.

Jess

Guest blogger – Pregnant in lockdown & 20 week scan

My 20 weeks

I’m so happy to be at this stage of the pregnancy. I’ve been feeling so much better, and my hormones have taken a step back, thank goodness. I also have my appetite well and truly back.

We decided to have a scan at 16 weeks as I knew my husband was unable to come to the 20-week scan due to him being away for with work. I didn’t want to wait until the 20-week scan.

The 16weeks was lovely we got a very detailed appointment which had so much information on our baby health, it was so reassuring. I highly recommend PAMS for this.

Then our 20-week scan was a lovely experience my mum got to join me this time. We also had the sex of our baby confirmed, which was so exciting.

With coronavirus and another lockdown happening the staff at the NNUH are still fantastic. I’ve found it a little strange having to have my midwife appointments over the phone, and a few of my appointment didn’t happen. I do know that they are extremely busy, and after a quick call, I was re-booked in for my telephone appointment.

The current lockdown has made me think about our birthing experience and what’s best to do. I know so many mums to be are looking at home births due to the current guidelines in hospitals at the moment. But for me personally, I’m going not to make any decisions right now and review this closer to the time, as I can’t imagine having a home birth.

With coronavirus and another lockdown happening the staff at the NNUH are still fantastic. I’ve found it a little strange having to have my midwife appointments over the phone, and a few of my appointment didn’t happen. I do know that they are extremely busy, and after a quick call, I was re-booked in for my telephone appointment.

The current lockdown has made me think about our birthing experience and what’s best to do. I know so many mums to be are looking at home births due to the current guidelines in hospitals at the moment. But for me personally, I’m going not to make any decisions right now and review this closer to the time, as I can’t imagine having a home birth.

thanks to my lovely guest blogger 🙂 have you been pregnant in lockdown? we would love to hear how you have found it?!

To read my other blogs and guest blogs please head over to my blog page.

Jess

Mothering FOUR boys – guest blogger

About us -Mothering FOUR boys.

Hi, I’m Kirsten, a make up artist and a mother to four (yes four) terrific, energetic and boisterous boys.

Let me tell you a little bit about them;

Cameron my eldest is eleven years old and will be starting high school in September. He loves dinosaurs and Fortnite. He is very soft natured, kind and caring.

Taylor is nine years old and is going into year 5 at Middle School. He is mischievous and always up to no good. He loves to draw and get creative.

Clarke is four years old and will be starting reception in September. He is obsessed with anything Marvel, which consists of dressing up, playing games and watching the movies on repeat. He’s started to enjoy learning and has recently mastered how to spell his name. He’s cheeky, cute and always manages to seem to get his own way.

Then last but not least, there is Tucker, he’s nearly 7 months old. This boy is constantly on the go, so full of energy.

Having a baby in lockdown

The boys Dad and I don’t live together, so when lockdown initially happened I was on my own with four boys for six weeks.

Tucker was nine weeks old when the UK went into lockdown, luckily most of our immediate family had already met him.

Tucker is exclusively breastfed. I found there were pros and cons to breastfeeding during lockdown. The pros obviously were that I didn’t need to prep anything, I didn’t have to wash or sterilise bottles. I didn’t have to worry about trying to get out and buy formula when everybody was panic buying.

The cons however I found that with cluster feeding and terrible feeding in the night, I was so physically exhausted, that my older boys didn’t get a lot of attention from me. I couldn’t go and sleep when Tucker did because I had the other boys to entertain/homeschool, so I was constantly running on empty.

Another con that I came to realise was that without his dad being around I stopped pumping and stopped giving him bottles, so when we did try and give him a bottle he was not having any of it. We tried several different bottles. In the end we ended trying Minbie,  which was recommended by a few other breastfeeding mums and although he didn’t take to it straight away with a bottle a day for a week he finally got the hang of it.

I was also worried that with little contact with other members of the family that Tucker would become very attached to me. I was worried that the possibility of returning to work would be very difficult if one he didn’t take a bottle and two he didn’t want to be with anyone other then me. But thankfully he’s such a happy contented baby that as long as he’s given the attention he really doesn’t mind he’s left with.

At around 5 1/2 months, Tucker started getting on his hands and knees rocking backwards and forwards. He is so eager to be joining in with his brothers. In the last week, he has mastered the army camo crawl, and my god is he fast.  I literally need eyes in the back of my head now because as soon as I’ve turned around he is after wires, plugs, shoes and they’re straight his mouth.

We started weaning a month ago, and I’m trying the BLW method. This is very new to me, With my other boys I did the traditional purée weaning. So with Tucker, I thought I’d try baby-led weaning, as it would be good for us all to be able to eat round the table together and potentially make Clarke a better eater, if he saw Tucker eating things that he has refused in the past to try.

I found the recipe book ‘by what mummy makes’ absolutely amazing, every recipe that I’ve cooked has been easy, delicious and has been a big hit with all the kids as well as Tucker.

Homeschooling

Let’s start this paragraph by saying I have a new found respect for teachers. Their job is hard, really hard.

Also trying to teach two different year groups, keep them both entertained and to stop them distracting one another exceptionally hard.

The teachers at their school had set up study-ladder and other online resources for the boys to do online, but I honestly found that if I let them do their school work on their iPads they would literally spend all day on electronics, instead I preferred buying workbooks and printing resources from the website twinkl. This way I could mark their work, see where they’re making their mistakes, help them correct their work and then find worksheets to help them strengthen their weaknesses.

The rule was, do some school work in the morning then you have the afternoon to do what you want. First two weeks, Cameron would moan and complain the work the school set was too hard and Taylor would just point blank refuse to do any work and would just sit on the sofa in his pants all day. I soon realised that this method wasn’t working for us.

My next attempt was planning their days with work and fun activities/experiments, this lasted for around a week before they decided they weren’t doing that either.

Then we tried every piece of work they did earn them 30mins on electronics, the more work they did the more time earned. This resulted in Cameron flying through worksheets, and with my hands full with Clarke and Tucker I could never mark it straight away, which Cameron took full advantage of.

The best method we have found for us is now quality over quantity. One work sheet which is above 70% correct, and they earn £1 day into their ‘gohenry’ account.

Cameron managed To save £55 and bought himself a Lego set and Taylor managed to save £30 and bought himself a new Jelly Cat teddy.

The boys also enjoyed that the school did weekly zoom assemblies/meetings to check  in with them and do assemblies.It also gave them the chance to see their friends.

In June both boys were offered to return back to school, which they both wanted to do. Cameron did Mondays and Tuesdays and Taylor did Thursdays and Fridays. It was good for them to get a little bit of normality back in their life and to see some of their teachers & friends.

It’s also been a hard time for Cameron as it was his last year in middle school. His last day of school should’ve been a memory for him to treasure forever but unfortunately that didn’t get to happen. He’s also not been to look round his new high school, he’s not met his new teacher, he has no idea who is in his form. Which is making the whole experience even more daunting for him.

Since the start of the six week holiday, I’ve scrapped all school work at home and we’re just enjoying the time as we would’ve done had a lockdown not happened.

-What I’ve learnt

That it is that is okay not to have a clean house or that one meal of the week was a freezer cooked dinner of chicken nuggets and chips, as long as everyone is happy that’s all that matters.

It’s okay if you need to cry, having a baby is an emotional rollercoaster as it is, let alone being in lockdown on your own, with very little physical support.

There will also be a day where I get to sleep through the night again. Probably won’t be for awhile, Tucker still wakes up twice in the night for a feed, and you know what I’m okay with that. He is my last baby and you never know when that dreamy bedtime cuddle will be the last so I’m going to make the most of them.

Things that seem hard now will become easier, just give it time. Being responsible for keeping one human being alive let alone FOUR can sometimes be overwhelming. It’s okay to want to spend a little bit of time to yourself. I don’t get a lot of time as Tucker is still breastfeeding but when I do get the chance to nip to my friends for a cup of coffee or even the food shop on my own, I feel I come back refreshed.

Kirsten

You can read my other blogs here.

Final Pregnancy Guest Blog- The Birth

Final Pregnancy Guest Blog- The Birth. My due date came and went, I had two unsuccessful sweeps and was booked in to be induced 11 days overdue. I managed to fit one last sweep in, two days before my induction date, and the following day my labour began!

At 1.00pm I arrived at the delivery suite, I went straight into a room for examination and for the baby’s heart rate to be monitored, luckily Sam was allowed in from the start due to the possible complications we may face. The midwife examined me, I was 3cm dilated, she explained that the baby had done a poo inside me and that I will need to stay in this room on this ward for constant monitoring. This was not my plan, but I really didn’t mind, I was more concerned about the wellbeing of our baby.  A midwife brought a couple of twinkly lights which she plugged in to make the room more relaxing, like the rooms on the MLBU. This was lovely of her to do for me, but in all honesty, after an hour or two when the pain got worse, I had my eyes closed for the majority of the time in there.

A little while after my examination I asked for gas & air which helped for a few hours however when the pain got worse, I asked the midwife for my second choice of pain relief- Remifentanil. I had read about this drug and I liked that it does not affect the baby unlike some of the more common types of pain relief.  The midwife examined me before calling the anaesthetist, I was 7cm dilated. I was so happy that I had made it that far with just gas & air, however, I knew the worst was yet to come. The anaesthetist fitted the cannula and explained, every time I feel a contraction about to start, press the button to release the drug. He explained that I must press it as soon as possible otherwise the drug will take effect after the contraction.

I had got the hang of pressing the button and the pain relief was helping, however, it did make me very drowsy and I could no longer watch the monitor of the baby’s heartrate beside me. Luckily Sam had been keeping an eye on it and noticed the baby’s heart rate had dropped, but it had also stayed low for a few minutes. He told the midwife who checked the printout and immediately pulled the emergency alarm. Within seconds there were several people in the room with us. They were all incredibly calm and explained to Sam and I that because the baby’s heart rate had stayed low for so long, they would need to take me straight into the theatre for a C Section under general anaesthetic. This was because they wouldn’t have time to administer an epidural and it also meant that Sam wasn’t allowed into the theatre with me. My earrings were removed, and my ring taped up, Sam was given scrubs just in case there was a chance he could come with me and I was ready for theatre. Just as they were about to take me away, the baby’s heart rate had stabilised long enough for the midwife to examine me. I was 9cm dilated and the surgeon really didn’t want to operate on me at such a late stage. They decided to call the c-section off for now and monitor the baby even more closely. Luckily within an hour, I had the urgency of needing to push. The feeling was so strong that I could hardly hold back despite the midwife telling me not to push yet because she hadn’t examined me. I was soon told that I could push on my next contraction, I felt so relieved yet scared because, after 41 weeks of waiting, the time had come to give birth naturally to our baby.

I started to push with each contraction but weirdly my contractions didn’t seem as strong as before.  I had a few pushes and Sam said he could see the head, however, the midwife explained that they needed the baby to be born quickly to reduce the stress to the baby. The best option would be an episiotomy. I agreed, and between contractions, the cut was made, I then pushed again, and Sam told me that the head was out. It was liberating to hear Sam say that because I felt that I was pushing as hard as I could, but she wasn’t coming out. A couple more pushes and our perfect little bundle was born!

Almost instantly after she was born, I went into shock, my whole body was trembling, and my teeth were chattering so hard it was difficult to talk. Our baby was placed on my chest where I started to panic because it wasn’t crying, the midwife was extremely calm and said she’s just gathering her breath, it felt like minutes had passed but it was just a few seconds later she started to cry. Sam announced that she was a girl and later cut her cord. I held her skin to skin for at least an hour where she pooed on me again, covering my tummy in thick black tar- but I didn’t mind one bit and stayed like it for several hours! I asked the midwife when I should feed her, which she replied whenever I want to try I can, within minutes she was latched on and feeding perfectly, this was extremely emotional for me, because I had been worrying that I may not be able to breastfeed as I know some mothers struggle with it for various reasons.

Sam, Baby and I spent the next 7 hours in the room together, hardly talking, just looking at her in our arms in complete awe. I will never forget the feeling of holding our tiny baby for the first time, it was everything I could ever wish for. Seeing Sam hold her was elating and filled me full of joy. Sam has been ready for a baby long before me, and to see how happy he was, was magical. A few hours later we called some family members on FaceTime to announce the news, this was a shock to everyone because we hadn’t told anyone that I had gone into labour- I had even been on the phone to my grandma that morning during my contractions and managed to keep it a secret!

And so parenting began…

I can’t thank Eloise enough for all her blogs you can read more blogs here

Jess

and if you wish to book a newborn shoot I am open and have spaces for late September onwards contact me here. 

Guest blog 30-36 weeks pregnant – nursery and packing the hospital bag

Nursery and packing the hospital bag 

Since finding out I was pregnant one of the first things I thought about was how I would like the nursery to look.  Having grown up on a farm and been lucky enough to visit some amazing countries with wild animals I have decided to go for a neutral colour and safari theme.  I know baby will be in our room for a while, but the nursey has been ready for a few months now!

Over the last few weeks I have been preparing my hospital bag.  I have read many articles online for what I need to pack and have also spoken to friends about their experiences and what they recommend.  I actually made a spreadsheet of what I needed for me, baby and a joint list. I then ticked the items off as I packed them.

I was due to have a scan at 36 weeks however, 2 weeks before, baby’s movements had been quiet and not half as active as normal.  I know that baby is normally active morning, night and a couple of times throughout the day but, I hadn’t felt baby move much for a day and a half.  I called my midwife and she suggested drinking some cold water, eating something sugary, laying on my left side and having a ‘poke and prod’ to see if any of these things would get baby moving.  Baby did move a couple of times, but nothing like it normally does.  An hour later I called the hospital which is what the midwife told me to do.  I was told to come to the hospital where they would take a closer look.

During the current Covid situation I had to attend the appointment alone, I had to follow the signs in the hospital and stick to the left side of the corridor.  There were nurses and hospital staff walking round with mask’s on, but nothing too scary or out of the ordinary.  At the reception I was greeted as normal and asked to wait in the waiting room.  The chairs were spaced out around the room and there were only a few of us in there so we could stick to the social distancing rules.

When I was seen by the midwife, she could not have been nicer or more friendly, she made me feel totally at ease, you would never have known that there was a pandemic going on.  She was extremely reassuring and treated me like she would have done any other time.  She scanned my tummy with a hand-held screen, we listened to the heartbeat and saw baby. We also saw that baby had turned around and was no longer breech!  This was a huge relief, meaning that I can plan for a vaginal birth again.

I was then connected to a monitor which detected the heartbeat, oxygen levels and baby’s other vitals.  While on the monitor I had to click a button every time baby moved.  Luckily in the car on the way to the hospital baby had moved a couple times, again while I was waiting to be seen and then during the time being monitored baby was pretty much back to normal!  The monitor turned green which indicated that it was happy with all the checks and I was happy with baby’s movements again.  The midwife signed me off and told me that I did the right thing to get checked out, and if the same thing happens again to come straight back, even if it is tomorrow.  I have been told so many times that if baby’s movements change, I should not hesitate to call the midwife.  One thing I will do before calling the midwife next time is go for a drive, I have realised that baby either really likes being in the car, or really hates it.  Either way it is normally very active in the car!

Since my last blog I have had 2 phone appointments and one face to face with the midwife during lockdown.  On the phone the midwife and I discussed my birth plan, which is now written and in my folder ready for the big day.  I understand that this is an ideal plan, and anything could change, but it is definitely worth discussing with your birth partner to make sure you are both on the same page.  We also discussed the changes the hospital has put in place during lockdown such as Sam will not be able to come into the hospital on arrival with me, instead I will be examined and if I am in active labour he will be allowed to join me.  If for any reason I have to stay in overnight, Sam wouldn’t be allowed to stay with me.  I think the temporary procedures are very fair and I am looking forward to the birth just as much as I was before lockdown.

Since about 35 weeks pregnant I have started to feel a lot less mobile.  If I sit down for too long I cease up and take a few seconds to be able to move freely again, likewise if I stand for too long my back aches and I need to sit down!  I am now struggling to put my socks and shoes on and it feels like I am wearing a tyre around my waist which is really restricting my movement.  I am told that baby should move lower down into my cervix soon which will relieve the pressure and as I write this I can feel baby pushing up under my ribs, which is quite uncomfortable! Today I felt baby had hiccups for the first time (that I’ve noticed).

During the current Covid pandemic, using Instagram has been an excellent way to keep up to date with any changes that are being made.  I receive notifications from the Midwifery Led Birthing Unit at Norfolk and Norwich Hospital; which is where I hope to give birth.  They have been excellent at posting relevant information and putting expectant mothers’ minds at ease.  I also follow different baby pages and often watch the live videos.  So far, I have watched a couple about breastfeeding, hypnobirthing, going through labour and once baby is here. I have found many of the videos very helpful and definitely learnt a few things too – this is one of a few positives to come from lockdown!

This will be my last blog before baby arrives, I am extremely excited about finally meeting our baby and finding out if it’s a boy or girl!  My next blog will be all about my birth experience, so fingers crossed it will all go smoothly!

Eloise xx

You can read Eloise other blogs here and I can’t wait to hear her baby news I have loved her real yet positive blogs especially with all that’s going on.

Giving Birth during the COVID19 Pandemic

Sam has kindly blogged her experience of giving birth recently during the COVID19 situation.

I was due to be induced on Monday 23^rd (10 days overdue) but was called to go in on Sunday 22^nd evening as they had a space for me, at this point the lockdown hadn’t started and everything seemed normal going into NNUH. I had a sweep on the Friday 20^th and the midwife was relaxed about the COVID19 situation and was taking each day as it came . Following any new guidelines as they were released,  I wasn’t worried about how it would affect my birth experience. The only concern I did have was I wanted a water birth but was told as long as I didn’t have symptoms and my labour progressed naturally this was fine to go ahead.

I had my waters broken on the Monday morning as I was 2cm dilated and was told to keep active to help get things going. We were free to walk about the hospital but were mindful of keeping distance from people and hand cleaning when re-entering the delivery suite.  I had been out 3 times but when we returned from our last walk a midwife said that they didn’t want us leaving the ward anymore due to the what was going on.

I hadn’t progressed enough so I was given Oxytocin and couldn’t have my water birth. With just Gas & Air, Oscar was finally born at 2.11am 24^th March weighing 9lbs 1oz.

We were moved to Blakney ward mid-morning and was told they would only keep me in for as short time possible. This was when we found out the country was in lockdown as we hadn’t seen the news. We were lucky as there wasn’t any restrictions in place yet for partners being on the ward.

When being discharged we were told that we shouldn’t have any visitors and my husband should isolate with us also due to spending time at the hospital. Unfortunately due to his job he wasn’t allowed to take extra leave and returned back to work the following Monday.

Before having Oscar I hadn’t taken much notice of what was put on social media regarding COVID19 as I know there’s so much fake news posted online. I tried to only watch the news and check the MLBU/NNUH Facebook and Instagram pages for updates. This is what I would advise expectant mums to do, as since being home I have seen on local mum group pages so many different stories/opinions that aren’t always up to date or helpful.

I managed to have 2 follow up midwife visits at home but only me and Oscar could be in the room, so my husband had to take our daughter into another room. They also phoned prior to arrival to ensure no-one in the house had a temperature or new cough. My discharge appointment however was different, this was a phone call to ensure things were going well. If this had been my first baby I’m not sure I would have felt comfortable with this so I feel for any first time mums at this time not having the follow up appointments as usual to give support. I then had to drop off my notes to the midwife unit in Hoveton.

Health Visitor appointment was also a phone call as they aren’t coming to homes either and they have booked another phone appointment for our 6 week review.

Being in lock-down with a newborn is without doubt tough, especially as I have a 2 year old to entertain also who is used to going to nursery 2 days a week and spending another 2 days with her Nanny’s.

The advice I would give to new/ expectant mums in lock down is this isn’t going to last forever, it’s tough and not ideal but there’s nothing we can do so try not to dwell on it. If you can prior to having baby, batch cook meals to have in the freezer. It’s one less thing to worry about! Make the most of the time at home with little ones, they’re really not little for long!

Take each day at a time, it’s ok to be emotional, overwhelmed or be in your pj’s all day (kids included) Who’s going to see you anyway. Go out for a walk when you’re ready/can, the fresh air does help and it breaks up the day. Also don’t compare yourself to what you see other mums doing on social media, everyone has a different situation, do whatever makes you happy. Use technology! Facetime, Zoom, Whatsapp video to keep in contact with family and friends. Get group chats going so you can have a good catch up! Finally make plans for what you want to do when this is all over!

If you have given birh during the COVID19 Panedmic and wish to share any tips please pop a comment below – I have lots of other blogs you can read here.

I also have a FREE guide to photographing your baby at home you can read and download.