3 questions to help you confidently parent on your terms 2018

Parenthood is a rollercoaster of emotions and can be a time in your life when everyone has an opinion on what you “should” be doing, here I’ve suggested 3 questions to help you confidently parent on your terms. I often hear parents doubting their choices and decisions.

From the moment you announce your pregnancy onwards, it can feel like some of the social etiquettes seem to have been forgotten – your great auntie Dot’s next door neighbour seems to feel like they have a right to know the intimate details of any medical appointment you have, people in the supermarket queues feel it is OK to touch your stomach,  strangers want to tell you their horror stories of birth and everyone you meet has an opinion on how you should be parenting (whether they have children or not!).

When you are tired, hormonal and learning this new role as a parent, it can become so confusing about which way to turn, what piece of advice to follow. The best antidote to this is to get really clear on the important things for you and your family unit.

• Get clear on how you want to be living life on your terms. What are your values and principles, that you want to be living your life by?
• Think about in years to come when your little people have grown up, how do you want them to describe you as a parent? How do you want them to describe your family?
• What are your key priorities for you and your family?

You can use these as your blueprint to guide your decisions and choices. When someone offers some well-meaning advice, or something causes you to question yourself, pause and ask yourself, “Am I acting in line with my values and priorities and how I want to parent?”.

Everyone’s parenting journey is unique – each child you have is unique. One thing I confidently will say is there is not one size fits all solution. My parenting journey is unique to me and not a carbon copy of any of my friends. Each of theirs is unique to them. Yours is unique to you. By recognising and accepting that everyone will make different choices, and no-one is right or wrong, will allow you to enjoy being a parent on your terms in a way that feels natural and comfortable for you.

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